How old is Grandma?
Stay with this -- the answer is at the end -- it will blow you away.
One evening a grandson was talking to his grandmother about current
events. The grandson asked his grandmother what she thought about the shootings at schools, the computer age, and just things in general.
The Grandma replied, "Well, let me think a minute, I was born before
television, penicillin, polio shots, frozen foods, Xerox, contact lenses, Frisbees and the Pill. There was no radar, credit cards, laser beams or ballpoint pens.
Man had not invented pantyhose, air conditioners, dishwashers, clothes
dryers, and the clothes were hung out to dry in the fresh air and man
hadn't yet walked on the moon.
Your Grandfather and I got married first - and then lived together.
Every family had a father and a mother. Until I was 25, I called every
man older than I, 'Sir' - and after I turned 25, I still called policemen and every man with a title, "Sir.' This was before gay-rights, computer dating, dual careers, daycare centers, and group therapy.
Our lives were governed by the Ten Commandments, good judgment, and common sense. We were taught to know the difference between right and wrong and to stand up and take responsibility for our actions. Serving your country was a privilege; living in this country was a bigger
privilege. We thought fast food was what people ate during Lent.
Having a meaningful relationship meant getting along with your cousins.
Draft dodgers were people who closed their front doors when the evening breeze started.
Time-sharing meant time the family spent together in the evenings and
we never heard of FM radios, tape decks, CDs, electric typewriters,
yogurt, or guys wearing earrings. Long hair meant classical music.
We listened to the Big Bands, Jack Benny, and the President's speeches
on our radios. And I don't ever remember any kid blowing his brains out
listening to Tommy Dorsey.
If you saw anything with 'Made in Japan' on it, it was junk. The term
'making out' referred to how you did on your school exam. Pizza Hut,
McDonald's, and instant coffee were unheard of.
We had 5&10-cent stores where you could actually buy things for 5 and
10 cents. Ice-cream cones, phone calls, rides on a streetcar, and a
Pepsi were all a nickel. And if you didn't want to splurge, you could spend your nickel on enough stamps to mail 1 letter and 2 postcards. You could buy a new Chevy Coupe for $600.00 but who could afford one? Too bad because gas was 11 cents a gallon.
In my day, "grass" was mowed, "coke" was a cold drink, "pot" was
something your mother cooked in, and "rock music" was your grandmother's lullaby.
"Aids" were helpers in the Principal's office, "chip" meant a piece of
wood, "hardware" was found in a hardware store, and "software" wasn't
even a word. And we were the last generation to actually believe that a
woman needed a husband to have a baby.
No wonder people call us "old and confused" and say there is a generation gap.... and how old do you think I am ???..... I bet you have
this old lady in mind.. You are in for a shock!
Read on to see -- pretty scary if you think about it and pretty sad at
the same time.
This Woman would be only....
58 years old!
So Many of These
4 guys are driving cross-country together -- one from Idaho, one
from Nebraska, one from Florida, and the last one is from New
York. A bit down the road the man from Idaho starts to pull
potatoes from his bag and throws them out the window.
The man from Iowa turns to him and asks, "What the hell are you
doing?"
The man from Idaho says, "Man, we have so many of these damned
things in Idaho they're laying around on the ground-I'm sick of
looking at them!"
A few miles down the road, the man from Nebraska begins pulling
husks of corn from his bag and throwing them out the window.
The man from Florida asks "What are you doing that for?"
The Nebraskan replies, "Man, we have so many of these damned
things in Nebraska I'm sick of looking at them!"
Inspired by the others, the man from Florida opens the car door
and pushes the New Yorker out.
